Daddy Su 33rd

On the 12th October 2017, the boy I know since 15 turns 33. This year was a little different from the previous, we had a new addition to our little family, our baby Marilyn.

This is the first time Daddy Su celebrate his birthday together with Marilyn.

Dear Daddy Mark, Mummy Lynn & Baby Marilyn love you lot, hope that all your wishes come true.

Happy 6th Months Baby

I seriously don't know where have all the time went to, just seem like you came into my life yesterday and you are already 6 months old today, Happy 6th Months, baby.

Bought you to your second wedding dinner last Saturday, you misbehave quite abit on that day, so restless for the whole wedding & mummy had a real hard time handling you alone while daddy is busy helping uncle Derek. 

But I'm still very proud of you, no matter how tired you are, you didn't make a big fuss, you just keep "complaining" (baby-talk) non-stop. Your action bought a lot of laughter to the people on our table, that my happy pill. 

Little Sunshine is 5months old

I seriously have no idea where have all my time went to, before I even know it, my little sunshine is already 5months old.

(this was taken on the actual day when Mari turns 5months - 

just wake up from sleep)

(5months old, attending Mik's 1st Birthday)

So much changes in the past few months, even the priority of my life changed, I don't mean it but it just happen this way, Marilyn became my priority in life even before my husband (sorry dear, I love you as much still, but just a little more for Marilyn now, lolz).

(Bringing Mari to polyclinic for her jab)

Marilyn is growing up really well, standing at 67cm, weighting 8.9kg the very last time (29.08.2017) we bought her for her jab. Big baby, over 100 percentile, but her overall growth is very proportional, nothing much for us to worry about, maybe just because both me & my husband was once a fat kid too. I bought her to Mik's 1st birthday party last Saturday (02.09.2017), Marilyn was almost the size of Mik, alot of people just don't believe she is only 5months old.

(Mari with the birthday girl, Mikayle)

(The usual gang, the group getting bigger with the kiddos)

Marilyn clock a couple of milestone the since my very last entry. On 25.07.2017, Marilyn make her first flip. On 19.08.2017, Marilyn first tooth start sticking out of her gum, her growth rate really surprised alot of people around me, they called her "Super Baby", lolz.

(The day which I discover the tiny white line on her gum)

On 28.08.2017, I bought Mari to her first haircut and I regretted that decision badly after that. The hairdresser asked how I want her hairstyle to be and I naively leave the decision to her, turn out, Mari look like boy boy once again. 

(Her messy pineapple head before the haircut)

(How she behave after the haircut, word bubble say it all)

(The differences)

Very soon, Marilyn will have 2 new playmates, just attended my brother-in-law wedding lately & his wife got a twinie. My parents-in-law are so happy about it, they hoping for grandchildren for so long and now one shot they gonna have 3 grandchildren, they really smile till cannot see their eyes.

(Bringing Mari to attend her Shushu's wedding dinner)

(Everyone want to take selfie with her)

My sister-in-law was complaining that Marilyn steal her limelight on her big day, all her relatives keep asking her about Marilyn & compliment that she was so cute & well behaved. Daddy Su don't usually carry Mari, but he proudly carry her around during the wedding dinner showing her to his relatives & colleagues.

The day after the wedding dinner, Daddy Su told me that he think he spend too much time with Mari the day before, he start to miss Mari a lot, and he can't stop complimenting on how well behave his daughter was during the dinner, that one proud daddy here.

I never know how my husband feel about the arrival of Mari until lately. He told me he can never understand the joy a kid can bring at the initially stage when his friend share with him. As at the start, Mari was pretty cranky & hard to handle for first time parent like us due to her colic. But as time pass, Mari start to interact with us, he start to truly understand the joy of being a father, this words melt my heart after hearing, the boy I used to love since young have truly grow up to a responsible man now.

(My little family photo)

Shall end this lengthy post with a cute Marilyn most recent photo. Will tried to update as much as I can, but it really not easy juggling with work & the little one now, no more me time, is all about my family now. 

(That Mari cheeky look when she wake up in the morning)

Passed the 2months Milestone

My girl is 2 months old a few days back, I can't imagine how fast time passed, in a month time, I will need to be back to work and leaving my girl to my mum & helper care, I gonna miss her so badly, can only get to see her on the weekend.

Parenthood is such an amazing process so far. At the initial stage, I simply can't wait to get back to work as I'm really very lost, not knowing how to handle her. But as time goes by, I hope that I can don't go back to work, I enjoy watching her growing process, wanna participant in them all.

I was amazed by the newborn transformation within months. Comparing on the photos took, then I can tell how much my girl grow, especially when she is wearing the same clothes.

My girl is growing to look so much like her father, having her in my tummy for 9months and she don't look a single bit like me, that so heart breaking. 

Playing with girl is so fun now, she is a very cheeky one, love to smile alot. When you talk to her now she will start to response and wanna play with you, that my little talkative one. 

Looking at her little smile on face each time, even having to wake up every 3hours in the night is all worth it. My sleepless night is nothing compared to those smile, love her so much. 

1month 13days

Feel like it had been quite awhile since Little Marilyn was born till date but I was wrong, today is Little Marilyn is only 1month & 13days old. During this period of time, Little Marilyn grow so much, this shows that all the formula she drink did not go on waste, they are well adsorbed.

When she was 14days young, I bought her to her newborn photography shot. Done many research before I make this selection, I didn't make the wrong choice, the way they handle Little Marilyn was really gentle and very thoughtful, it never an easy task to handle my cranky girl, and the photos turn out really well.

Little Marilyn BB shower was separated into 2 sessions, first was my parents-in-law side with our friends, and the other was my family members. The first session was a horror, didn't expect my parents-in-law invited so many people, my house was literally FULL, so scary. But really thank you all the guests for their generosity of gifts & angbaos, didn't expect that Little Marilyn will received such overwhelming gifts from all. But sadly, didn't manage to take much of photos with my friends that day.

The 2nd session was a little quieter and easier to manage as all the guests are my immediate family members. This time round manage to snap a few photos with my husband & girl.

So far till date, I would say parenthood is really a very tiring journey, we are require to sacrificed so much of our social life, me time and even sleep, but what you received back is kinda priceless, just a smile from the little one can easily wipe off all your exhaustion.

I really appreciate the arrival of this little angel into my life.  

My Elective C-section Process & Post-natal Blue

It had been slightly more than a week since our Little Marilyn arrival to this world. It was a painfully yet amazing experience I would say.

One day before the scheduled delivered date, hubby bought me to eat the food I craved most. Other than durian he still refused to give in (afraid that the sugar content is too high), I request to have "bak chor mee" for dinner. I had a really sinful meal that night including "bak chor mee", "hokkien mee", "fried kway tiao" & my long craved "fried oyster" (but I am only allow to eat the starch & egg potion), been awhile since I indulgence myself with so much hawker stuff, had always been careful of what I eat the past 9months to make sure my girl have the best of everything.

Start my fasting at 0000 hours, it had been a long sleepless night for me, waiting is always the longest process. Finally alarm went off at 4am, get myself prepared & wake my husband up, & we are off to hospital. We reach the registration counter by 6.30am, the process was long, after registration the nurse show me to the ward, asked me to get myself prepared before they wheel me to the operation theater.

Hubby wasn't allow to go the same way as I do, the process of being wheeled to a strange place without anyone by your side was really scary, but they keep ensuring me that my husband is already outside the theater, once I was done with the epidural and he will be in in no time.

Having the epidural jab was really no joke, it so freaking pain, finally I saw my husband walk & sit beside me after the jab, but at the moment of time I'm already in a blank state of mind, no matter what he say to me it seem like I can't digest a word.

Almost to the end of the process, 2 of the nurses come up to me, using their body weight and pressed really hard and push my baby out from the opening womb, even with half body numb I can say it was really uncomfortable & really painful experience, I try so much to hold my tears back, till I hear her first cry.

From far, I hear a fade crying sound, that Marilyn's first cry. At that moment of time, I can hold my tears back no more & I start crying away too. The doctors & nurses start congratulating us on the arrival of our princess, my husband starts to follow the mid-wife to do the cleaning & taking the measurement of our girl. At that point of time I had forgotten that my gynae still doing my stitches, all I do is lay my eyes to wherever they carry my girl to and I wanna have a glare of her. At last, I carry my girl for the first time & we took our very first family photo together.

The theater was cold, so they need to quickly settle my girl & bring her to the nursery room, while I was send to the recovery room before going back to the ward. About an hour after resting in the recovery room, they finally send me back to the ward, so nice to seem familiar faces, having my husband & sister already waiting in the ward for me. 

It was a really tired day & I'm overwhelmed with the number of visitors that dropped by, just wasn't in the correct state of mind to entertain so many guests still, but I really appreciate the thoughts & gifts from everyone. 

Tried breastfeeding but the supply won't usually kick in that fast, it was a very frustrated process I would say. The baby is starving, your supply is low, tons of comments given by all the old folks together with the ear ringing cry from your baby, that was really a very depressing moment & I feel that I really failed the simplest duty of a mother. 

Luckily I had very supportive husband and family members, they help me to overcome all my down time and keep assuring me that I'm doing all fine even if I don't breastfeed, there is always formula milk and my girl will not starved, not breastfeeding doesn't make me any less of a mother compared to the rest. 

The main reason for me to stop breastfeeding is not because my supply was low, the supply actually kick in by the fourth day, but due to the wrong latching method and the strong suction of my starving girl, I was bleeding away and covered with bruises. I felt if I continue to breast feed, it pretty unhygienic for my girl, so that is the main reason. Without breast feeding stress also makes taking care of Marilyn easier for me, at least I know how much input my girl have. 

The crying of baby can make one really helpless & frustrated. After taking care of Marilyn a few days, I finally manage to more or less understand what does her each cry means and able to understand her feeding timing & habits, most importantly, I finally able to get enough sleep knowing her schedule. I'm sorry that I make each & everyone worry about me, but I'm really doing fine now, I guessed being depressed is part of the post-natal blue, and I had passed the stage now with the help I had for everyone, especially my mum & husband.

3rd Wedding Anniversary

Time really fly, it seem like we are just made our vows yesterday, all memories still fresh & clear in our mind but today is already our 3rd year wedding anniversary.

During this 3 years period, life is full of ups & downs, but we chose to forgive & forget, learn to accept our differences & work towards the common goal we had in life.

And very soon, it will no longer be just the 2 of us, we are expecting the arrival of our little one in no time, another motivation in life for just to work even harder than more.

(30weeks 4days old, look at her chubby cheek)

Since today is our 3rd year wedding anniversary, I shall take this special day to disclose our little one name. We had decided a English name for this little one, I find this name is very meaningful for our firstborn, we shall name her Marilyn, taking the 3 first 3 alphabet of both daddy (Mark) & mummy (Lynn) name. 

Last but not least "HAPPY ANNIVERSARY MY DEAREST HUSBAND"

Third Trimester

Another milestone clocked, both Little Sunshine & I had officially stepped into our third trimester, Little Sunshine is 28weeks 0days as of today.

To look back now, pregnancy journey was really a tough one, feeling lethargy, loss of appetite & insomnia in the first trimester, to getting all my energy back, but haunt by backache, cramps, clumsiness, water retention, always hungry & insomnia still in second trimester, I seriously don’t know what more am I going to expect in third trimester. Dilemma, feeling worry, but yet looking forward at the same time, not much time before Little Sunshine “pop”, but I still have so much thing not done yet. I have not done any shopping till date so far, all the necessity like baby cot, stroller, bouncer, milk bottles, formula, diapers etc not bought yet, and I haven’t even start sourcing for my maid.

So much thing to do and so little time left, at this moment I also don’t know I should start from where now, feeling so lost.

The baby bump is getting super heavy lately and I looked like an enormous Snorlax walking around. Getting really bulky & clumsy nowadays, every small little movement seem to be a pain in the ass to me. My back feel like it gonna break into 2 pieces in no time and how I wish I can just lay still on my cosy bed and not move at all. The worst of all is my bloated elephant legs is killing me, feel like punching anyone right in their face if they accidentally step on my feet now. Guess that the pain of pregnancy after all.

Time to start counting down

Everyday, is a new Experience for Us

10.01.2017 was such an unique experience for Daddy Su. At time before we head for bed, I will grab daddy’s hand and place on my tummy for him to feel Little Sunshine movement as I had been telling him how strong is her kick and movement was nowadays. But as usual, Little Sunshine wasn’t very cooperative during that time, she will just give daddy a gentle touch despite how much I rubbed my tummy and wake her up from sleep, that my naughty princess.

Little Sunshine enjoy TV time the most, whenever we went for movie or watch TV at home, she will start to kicking me aggressively. Daddy saw me rubbing my tummy while watching TV that evening, he turns his head over and ask me to stop disturbing Little Sunshine sleep. I told him that Little Sunshine was dancing in my tummy and at this very moment, Little Sunshine give me a very strong kick, daddy can even see the movement on my tummy without touching it (I was wearing a tight top at home). He was really shock, so I quickly take this opportunity to disturb daddy from his TV time, I went over and sit closely to him, grab his palm to rest on my tummy. This is the very first time daddy feel such big movement from Little Sunshine and he was really amazed by it.

Almost coming to the end of my 2nd trimester now, next week onward, I’ll be stepping into my 3rd trimester, this journey didn’t come by easy at all. Currently I was haunt by insomnia, backache, cramps & bad water retention on my legs. All my movement start to become so clumsy, just a simple action of picking up stuff from the floor can left me breathless. I can’t walk as fast as before anymore, every steps I take now I can feel the pins & needles under my feet, even daddy have to slow down and suit my paces now.

Little Sunshine, please be healthy and strong, we are almost there. Date are getting closer as each day passes, Daddy & Mummy gonna see you real soon, we are so looking forward for your arrival. We love you so much.

Now then I know exactly the meaning of "loving someone so deeply even before we met".

That my elephant feet now. Overgrown all my shoes.