The Pillars in our Family

I had been very sad lately, ultimately depressed.

On 16th June 2015, my grandpa left. Even though everyone are well prepared for his departure anytime soon, but it still hurt. I did not make it in time to bid my final good bye to him. He left in the evening, I'm not able to beat the after office hours traffic from school to reach in time.

The funeral was full on hic-up, fight broke out internally during the last day. We did not even manage to complete the ritual for grandpa, I do not know how can he ever rest in peace seeing their children behave in this manner, fighting in the public.

Last Tuesday, it my grandma's turn. She was perfectly fine leaving without any form of symptom. It was the 15days after my grandpa left, on a same Tuesday, I received a message saying that my grandma was send to A&E, sadly, I did not make it once again, she pass away on her way to the hospital.

That was really a great impact to everyone of us, especially the children, our parents. They lost both their parents on the same month, the first grieve have yet to settle down and here come another blow.

The scene in hospital was awful, fight broke out once again, involving the councilor in hospital and policemen, my family was really a disgraced in the public, getting other to step into our family affair.

Finally everything was over yesterday, the past 5days was really super tensed, just hoping that everything can settle peacefully. My mum collapse when she saw my grandma's coffin heading for the cremation, I saw her eyes flip and I'm so afraid that my mum with leave with my grandma. I yelled at my top of the voice trying to pulled her back to sense, ask her to just look at me and my sister but nothing else, I was really freak out at the point of time, I tremble so badly after my mum was back.

Just like after my grandpa's cremation, my body are covered with bruises now just to grab hold of my mum. I'm so grateful that my husband and brother-in-law are there to help us, without them, me & my sister won't be able to handle the whole situation ourselves.

The final lap is over now, I'm still feeling rather lost about the leaving of both of my grandparents, but at the same time, it might be a good thing that they left together, at least they have each other accompany on the rainbow bridge.

Yeye, Ahma, please rest in peace now, everyone is in a good hand, both of you will live in my heart forever.

Gratitude

Firstly, I would like to express my gratitude to our Singapore founding father, Mr. Lee KY, for what he have done for each and every individual in Singapore. As neutral as I am, I’m neither interested in any political  issues nor support any political parties in Singapore, but Mr. Lee KY grain every respect from me for what he had done for us, he always put the interests of the people in Singapore before himself. I admired his far foresight, he kept all his promise that he made to every citizens even the promise can only honour like decades later. 

 

On the Sunday itself, I woke up early to make breakfast for my husband and I start tuning in to Channel 5. From morning till 12noon, Mr. Lee life story was aired throughout the period, there a charisma in him which enable him to earn the trust of the people with his word, his words are really impactful, strong and convincing. Through the documentary, I came to learnt that the luxury we enjoyed now should never be taken for granted, through all his hard work and the support with his team, he made Singapore one of the best country over the world, with strong economy that people look up to.

 

His love story is the part I love most. I never believe that one can stick with another through the thick and thin even I’m already married now, but he proved me wrong, is all on the choice one chose.

 

I watch the whole live telecast of his state funeral, his death really bring the whole Singapore together, the familiar warm island which I once known and lost through the years. As our economy growth through the years, our paces of living increasing with it, many time, we are so focus on living up to the standard and we are too worn out and lost we very initial “humanity” through the process. But I see the sky cried together with our citizens on last Sunday for the loss of our founding father, the scene touches me and I’m glad to see that in the deepest part of individual of us, we still know what is gratitude.

 

Life and death is part and parcel of life, too many things happen lately that make me really think twice about life. My grandfather was diagnose with stage 4 lung cancer recently, I saw how much pain he suffered with this illness, it really break my heart. But no doubt he is always the strongest man I used to know, even at this very last stage of life, his though was not to put the burden of himself to other. Who in the right state of mind planned for his own funeral? None other than my great man, my grandfather.

 

He chosen his own photo for the casket, the clothes to wear, and arranged every single details of his own funeral, his though really put me into tears. Not only this, he even pass on the message to my mum what to do for my grandmother after he is gone, the arrangement of my grandmother funeral in future when he is not around, he want to make sure everything will fall in place as he won’t be around to attend to it. From my memories, although my grandparents does not have any wonderful love story to shared, but they stick to each other all these decades.

 

Too many heart breaking stories been heard lately, too much to digest and my emotional was greatly affected. I’m never a believer of god, but since there is no cure to my grandfather illness, I just hope that if god really existed, please be kind to my grandfather, I know his time is almost up, I’m not expecting miracle will happened, but just grant his an easy death. Please be kind to this great old man of mine, thank you god.

 

I’m always thankfully for what my grandfather had done for us throughout the years.

I love you, yeye.

 

Our Housewarming Session

First round of housewarming with the peepz done last Saturday, thank you everyone for coming, that was a great catch up session

Posted via Blogaway

MIA from the cyberworld Update

Been a long while since my last update. MIA for quite a long while, surprisingly a few closed friends of mine notice my disappearance in the cyberworld and got pretty concern about that. Feel so good to have friends like them around me.

Time are tough, but I manage to pull through it. I had officially moved away from the East, to a totally unfamilar place at Yishun. Far away from the area I grow up at, guess it a good thing, good way to start afresh, not gonna to bump into people that I wanna avoid again.

Just some photo of my cosy nest.

My shoe rack cum wall partition for the main gate.

My open concept kitchen.

My living area, I love the bay window concept.

My dinning area behind the sofa, initially was suppose to be a build up study room, but we decide to give it a miss, so that our living room will be very spacious.

Did not take any picture of the room as there nothing special about them, I chose to make it as simple as possible. My guess was right, we spend most of our time in the living room so far.

Having a house of our own wasn't easy at all, so much household chords, I can hardly cope it together with my work and study.

But I so glad that I had a very understanding hubby, he changed so much through the years, now he even helping me out with the chords when I go to school on Saturday. The boy I used to date had became a man which I can entrust my future to.

This year CNY was a little different as compared to usual, first CNY of giving instead of taking. Had a really early reunion dinner with my family, at my house. So excited on the preparation, how i wish Dino was here with us too.

Oh ya! Thanks to Jaimie and HJ for the house warming gift and I'm able to do lot of fried crabsticks for the CNY too.

After our reunion dinner on 09/02, I flew off to Philippines for business trip the very next day, same for hubby, but he head to BKK instead to look for Jaryl.

Business trip to Philippines this time was an enjoyable one, lots of free time and manage to do some shopping and have a good sleep.

Came back a day before Valentine, manage to have a simple dinner with Hubby.

On the CNY eve, hubby came and pick me up from work, we head back to our own house to packed our stuffs before we head for our reunion dinner at my in-law's place, gonna spend a night there as we will be off to Chiangmai on CNY first day.

Chiangmai trip was a fun one, will not talk much about that and I'll leave the photos to do the talking.